today marks another chapter in my life. cliche as it may seem…4 months after being an operations manager i am now tasked to take lead on a different field…it was a very difficult decision to make…one of the toughest i have ever made in my life…but then i want to choose to become a good soldier…and find my happiness there…
i have prepared myself before i became an OM…becoming a manger per se…is a visual put on stage by my mentor…i have to live up to it…but deep inside my intention is to exceed it…
i was eating chicking my entire life…and wanted to have a bigger chicken because i so love it..my dream is to indulge myself with a turkey…but then..a hotdog came…and out of hunger and tiredness of chicken, i ate it..it did satisfy me…and started to love it…it is my new bed of roses and i found comfort…but then..the turkey came…and it was bigger and tastier than i have ever wanted…but then…i have not finished my hotdog yet…what to choose?..what to choose?…
i can only thank god for this blessing…i humble myself that i don’t have to worry about food…and he gave me my favorite at that…i am amazed how He has moved my lands for me to reach this far…and i promise will bring back the glory to Him…
it was a choice of becoming a good soldier or to be happy…and my answer is to become a good soldier and find happiness in it…
and now..as i turn another chapter in my life..you will hear new names, new stories…new tastes…thank you for being there for me…let us both enjoy this turkey…and get closer to the vision of having the most feastfull table there ever has been
there was a duck…who always wanted to fly like an eagle…all his life this duck knew it is not impossible for a duck to fly as high as an eagle…and so this duck climbed up the mountain..it was really high, and dark, and thorny..along the way..the duck had several wounds, and his webby feet got torn apart…but also, along the way…this duck developed muscles to strengthen her wings and his feet…the duck also had to eat what the mountain has to offer, and so his duck-like beak had to learn how to bite off from rats and other meat…it got sharp as days pass by….
not long enough…the duck reached the top…he was really happy…there was an enormous amount of happiness that embraced his soul..he knew that a duck can see what an eagle can…he flap her wings out of ecstasy and realized that he can also fly higher than other ducks could…he was flying like how an eagle can…
he was so happy he rushed back down to the pond to share this story to his family…upon reaching the pond, everyone was avoiding him…and as he looked at himself in the water…he didn’t knew that a duck actually turned out to be an eagle…he won’t be able to swim like ducks can because he no longer have his webby feet…but he is an eagle…just like his dream…he is able to fly just like eagles can…
i have enrolled myself in bioessence 8 days back, and after 4 sessions, i have lost 3 pounds. i needed help…and so i justify that to myself after spending 15000 for a 30K package of slimming treatments. so far, the srevice has been very consistent. i just hate the fact that i have to follow a diet plan…right now, i am 80% of the time following the diet plan. imagine, they just want me to eat wheat bread, oatmeal, and more wheat bread for one whole week! it is so freakin frustrating and i feel famished to death and more than anything, DEPRIVED…what i do now is imagine that all my favorite foods are like affairs. yes they will feel good and right at that moment that you are lingering its goodness in your mouth, but once the pounds starts counting, then you know you did something wrong….no matter how hard you try to hide it…sisig is an affair, chocolates is an affair, pizza would be my one great love that i can never have…*sigh* wanting to see myself in that skimpy 2 piece at boracay…
as i color this canvas black, i had orange in my head.
i walked forward, when i wanted to go what’s in store behind the road.
i danced with margarita, when i had zombie in my heart.
panting.
beads of oil on my forehead.
holding my breath so i can tuck this flab.
do you hear the scream in my head?
i need your help.
i can no longer stand this deadly flesh wrapped around my body.
the residue of the pleasure that danced in my tongue.
i need your help to fight them.
i can no longer stand on my own two monstrous thighs.
i want out.
i want to get out and run so fast so that this pig escapes from the mirror.
i call out to you.
help me.
i can not do it alone.
i dunno where to begin
i dunno where this feelings are coming from
caught surprised by the mess of this week
im sick, i seek.
trying to catch the fading waves of the sea
trying to stall the sunset
repeatedly reading the last page of the book
no matter how many times it took
echo is all i hear
suddenly scared of waiting
why do i feel that this is a new journey
i thought i was free, but this i see
i raise my hands and cry to You
i surrender all of these
a deeper sense of sanity and peace
i thank Thee, i thank Thee
